Tag Archives: life

I haven’t forgotten about you, I just forgot you existed. It is different, okay?

No long winded explanation as to why I’ve been absent. Here is the short version: 

1. I teach full time. 

2. I coach a spring sport. 

3. I am a full time student in grad school. 

4. I’m taking additional courses through the state for certification purposes. 

5. I need to sleep occasionally. 

6. I had kidney stones and ruptured ovarian cysts ALL WITHIN THE SAME DAY. 

 

Needless to say, I’m a little tired. So I am not going to do a lot of regular posts; rather, I am going to bring together blogging and mindless tv watching. My students have instructed me to watch Teen Wolf, so here goes nothing. I’ll be occasionally live blogging my thoughts to various episodes, starting with my next post! YAY. 

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Dear dad: it may be best if you just don’t read this one. Well, at least the first half.

Why is it that I always feel the need to blog at one in the morning? What is it about this time that makes my brain go, “HEY YOU! YES YOU! BLOG! BLOG NOW!” I always do this; I get my computer because I know this blog will just be freaking fantastic and then I sit down and realize yeah, no, it won’t be. Partly because I have already forgotten what brilliant thing I was going to share with you, and partly because I think to myself I’m totally Carrie Bradshaw and this is great and I can be a brilliant writer like she is, no big deal. Except I don’t blog about sex. Which is why she has a column in a newspaper and I….don’t even have a job.

But then I have to remind myself that yes, Carrie Bradshaw is a fictional character with poor taste in men, and that one of these days that job will come around. And here we find ourselves at what I like to call “unpopular opinion time”. I’ve been doing an experiment. Well, not really an experiment but let’s call it that because it makes me feel smart. I’ve seen episodes of Sex and the City from time to time, usually late at night when the mood strikes to clean my room. But then I realize it is already clean, so I must look for things to clean, and in doing so, watch some SATC. I like it well enough, but I never really saw enough of the show to keep track of who was dating who and who Samantha was sleeping with. Then one day my friend really wanted to watch the movie (the first one) and I was all okay yes I will watch it with you. So we did. And it was good, nothing great or mind blowing (though let’s be honest, there was a lot of other blowing in that movie) and so I decided that the time had come to watch the first season.

And quite frankly, I’m underwhelmed. I know, I know, it takes place in the 90’s and yes, I adore the 90’s. I grew up in the 90’s- I am a 90’s child forever. But seriously. Carrie’s hair. MIRANDA’S HAIR. Charlotte and Samantha had great hair the first season but oh my gosh I thought this show was supposed to be full of…good fashion? When do we get the good clothes? I mean, Sarah Jessica Parker has a rockin body and she always looks decent, but I suppose my premature viewing of later seasons has ruined the first for me. Does anyone else feel this way? Does anyone else honestly care? Probably not. But the other thing I have to say is Oh. My. Gosh. I absolutely hate, loath, and despise Mr. Big. I mean the man is such an ass! And seeing as I’ve seen the movie, I know how things end up and may I just say Carrie Bradshaw I am completely disappointed in you.

Now that I have gotten that out of the way, I don’t really remember what I wanted to talk about. I suppose things in my life, but those are pretty mundane and boring. I mean, I am enjoying life– today I bought my costume for the Harry Potter premiere, but other than that it has just been filling out applications to schools and applying for out of state certification. Oh, yes, and watching a lot I mean A LOT of Doctor Who. And I think Matt Smith is quickly overtaking David Tennant as my favorite doctor.

I know, who am I anymore? Crazy world.

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Things are about to get real. You have been warned.

So I’ve started and deleted and restarted and deleted and restarted this post many times. I have something I want to say, and I don’t know how to say it; I hope this draft will actually get published because it is a topic I am very interested in: The objectification of women.

I was watching a television show and one of the main characters was wearing a “revealing” top (this show is from the 90’s so it was considered “revealing” back then). This particular top put all her curves on display and showcased her entire back. She said she liked the top because it made her feel “saucy.” As she walked down the hallway many guys leered in her direction, nodding in approval. She then came upon three guys who threw out comments such as “who turned down the temperature in here? It’s ice cold” and “Damn where you been hiding those?” (The third guy, her supposed best friend, just stood there and laughed.)

The next thing I know she is calling in to the hurt line, saying she was sexually harassed and suddenly she is a victim and the guys were all sent to sensitivity camp.

Now, while I fully believe those comments were disgusting, one of the male characters said something that made me think. He told her if she didn’t want to be objectified, she shouldn’t wear the outfits.

Huh. I think he has a point. I mean, come on. Most every single girl has worn a particular outfit just to get a guys attention, be it from one guy or a whole room. Girls know (most of the time) exactly what they are doing when they put on an outfit. She herself said it made her feel “saucy” and to that I say, good for you! A lot of girls don’t wear clothes they want to because they are too shy. She had guts! But don’t think that guys are supposed to look the other way and not think typical guy thoughts because you are only wearing the outfit to make yourself feel good. Plenty of girls have admitted to me that guys making comments and calling out to them *IS* what makes them feel good about themselves!

But then I started playing devils advocate. You wouldn’t believe how many men stare at my chest. It is UNBELIEVABLE. And I will admit it, YES! Sometimes I DO wear a particular top that will draw attention. I have worn plenty of dresses (both on purpose and not) that have caused men of various ages to call out to me. But I can wear a t-shirt and guys will still stare at my chest. I mean, I can’t help it. I have boobs. Every girl does, mine just happen to be bigger than others. Does that give men the right to stare at them?

See, here is the issue. No matter what I put on, 97.8% of the time, I will have cleavage showing. It is just a fact. I wear camisoles under my shirts, I sew the neck line up a little, I wear sweaters, I do all sorts of things to make the cleavage magically disappear (which it never does). And guys (even my gal friends) always point this out to me. They say, “woah, Lauren, showing a little cleavage there huh?” And I look in the mirror and my shirt is up rather high but I STILL HAVE CLEAVAGE THAT I CAN NOT CONTROL. So I calmly point out that I can’t help it, and I shouldn’t have to dress like a nun to be modest. It embarrasses me when they say this stuff; it makes me feel slutty when I am wearing a perfectly fine outfit.

So where do we draw the line? I think that if a girl puts on a revealing outfit, especially if this is done on purpose because she wants attention, then she deserves every derogatory mark shouted at her. But if a girl wears a t-shirt, A T-SHIRT, or any modest shirt, then it is unacceptable for guys to objectify her.

So what do you think? Am I completely wrong in my rationale? Did those guys in the show deserve to go to sensitivity training? Would you consider those marks to be sexually harassing? I’d love some input.

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