BEDA 4: Just Listen to the Music of the Traffic In the City…

Having gotten myself into this BEDA thing, I have been thinking of other popular acronyms in which I could participate. So I have decided this year I am going to take part in NANOWRIMO. If you are unfamiliar with this term, it stands for NAtional NOvel WRIting MOnth. For the entire month of November thousands of people set out to write their own 50,000 word novel and then submit them to the NANOWRIMO site. I talked about it here once. I don’t think there was any way in hell I could have participated this past November because I was in England and had an insane amount of papers to write and rolls of film to take and develop and oh yeah, I WAS IN ENGLAND. So I wasn’t going to sit in my room all day every day writing a novel. But this year is different.

I was just living my life, minding my own business when I watched Nerimon’s (Alex Day to all of you non-youtubers/nerdfighters) latest VEDA video in which he discussed his plans for this years NANOWRIMO. And may I just say, his idea sounds really awesome. So awesome that I have decided to participate this year. The thing is I know my schedule for next semester and I am going to be doing a field study in a high school and taking an insane amount of credit hours. So I need to get to planning right now. I need to know what I am going to be writing and get together a basic structure etc. so that by the time November rolls around I can just bust out this novel and then spend every waking hour editing it. The only problem to this amazing idea is I have no idea what I want to write about. Its like I have writers block and I haven’t even started writing the thing.

I mean I have some general ideas about what to write but the most difficult thing is writing stories isn’t exactly “my thing.” I mean, I can bust out a paper for any class like nobody’s business but when it comes to writing stories and such I tend to get distracted and it all just falls apart. I know what sort of genre I want to focus on, but the actual plot? No idea. But Internet I am determined! And as always, I will keep you updated if when I make any progress.

In other news tomorrow is Sunday. Yes, you most likely knew this. But Sunday is one day away from Monday and Monday is the day I go back to classes. I do not want to go back to classes. I do not want to go back to school. I want to drop out and move into the mall. That would be ideal. Not that my classes are horrible or anything (except that horrendous linguistics class- it is just gross). I am just ready to get out there and teach the kids. Make lesson plans and grade papers. Make up tests and assign projects and decorate my classroom and everything else that comes with being a teacher. I met with my advisor and I have two more years left of this stuff. TWO MORE YEARS. Well really one and a half because the last semester of your senior year is full time student teaching. I knew when I chose this major and applied to colleges that I would be here for five years. I don’t think there is anyway you can graduate with an education degree these days in four years without absolutely killing yourself and having no social life. I think it is more the fact that I heard it officially- I will officially be here two more years. And it isn’t the classes or the schedules or anything similar that bothers me. I love everything about school from writing papers to freaking out about exams to going school supply shopping. I love supply shopping so much I practically orgasm when I step into Staples or Office Depot. The more I think about it, the more I can’t really explain why I don’t want to go back. It is just not right- I love school! I am supposed to want to be there, getting out my notebook and participating in deep literature discussions. And yet I find no excitement in walking to class. No excitement raising my hand and sharing why I think the author chose to set a particular confrontation scene in front of a country club swimming pool. I think last semester burnt me out and this semester I feel… I guess the word I have been associating with myself lately is numb. I don’t feel anything. I don’t want to be at school and I don’t want to be at home. I have no desire to go anywhere (except NYC. But that is just my inner Holly Golightly.) or do anything. I think this summer is going to be a very nice relaxing time to get my crap together and sort of settle back into my normal routine. May 30th- you can’t get here fast enough!

Have a happy April! See you tomorrow.

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1 Comment

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One response to “BEDA 4: Just Listen to the Music of the Traffic In the City…

  1. I can’t imagine having to go to school 5 years. Then again, the two years I spent in school were jam-packed with four years of education, so saying I was exhausted probably isn’t even necessary, but if I’d had to do that for so much as half a year longer I think I would have gone mad.

    Persevere!

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