Sitting in a parking lot

And I have come to realize that my sister and I could put on some pretty spectacular Broadway musicals, however we would need some more family-friendly tunes. Currently in our go-to musical vault:

1. “Take Me or Leave Me” from Rent

Yeah, let’s just call this one what it is: The Lesbian Song. It’s great and all, but I would just feel wrong asking my own sister if she “wants her girl hot.” I mean, in front of an audience. We sing this I’m the car allll the time.

2. “Light My Candle” from Rent

This one is slightly better but again, wickedly inappropriate–especially if my grandma comes to the show. I don’t do drugs literally or figuratively, and my sister complimenting my ass while I search the floor for my stash would only lead to awkward family moments later down the road.

3. “What Could be Better” from BABY

Yeah, so if you haven’t heard this song WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU WHY DO YOU HATE THEATER? Go listen to it now; this blog will be here when you return.

Now that your back you can understand my dilemma with this wonderful tune. Sure it is catchy, but singing about the detailed process of a sperm traveling towards an egg is not something I would like to sing in detail to all of those fathers out there in le audience. (Hi dad!!! Hope you’ve stopped reading this by now!)

4. Anything from Avenue Q

It’s Avenue Q. They have a song titled “The Internet is for Porn.” Enough said.

 

 

 

Despite of these songs (which we would rock, by the way), I’m fairly sure no matter what we sang we would bring the house down. In tears. And tears because we are good.